Nõutu maailm V`17127

I thought of one was given a million
my thought was of bit of solid land
I was given million miles of water
all I needed was place to stand
they tell me that I am God -
million miles of water to walk on
should be enough to take a stand
this one is my all
this one should never be taken nor played with
this one is my life this one is not
this absence of one is the absence of me
this one is love his love for me
for I love him
for the world loves me he does not
the world sees my pain and feels need to heal my broken heart
and give reason to my meaningless life
showers me with all beautiful, but his love
for that it can not give me for it is his to give
as I have given him mine and left myself emptyhanded
in this beautiful world open for me, waiting for me
for life besides him feels no fear nor doubt
gives me all in his heart, what he fears to give
for the world loves me with the light of his soul
even then this boy of mine loves me not
for the world brought him into my life to give a chance
for everything I ever desired, craved or dreamt of
life trusted me with the key of life and it´s deepest secrets
so I would carry it on and let it grow with me
so I would share it and make it flourish
he was a chance, I am sure of that
and that chance failed, life´s promise could not be fulfilled
for there is his mind and freedom to choose
and he chose me not, even then my heart chose him
for I do not know, what to dream of or need or want
for life looks at me crying and shelters my red eyes
with glistening light and joy glowing from my heart set free
for my heart is not bound to this life nor world
for he set me free from ever wanting or needing
for what could be given to a heart, what does not need?
so life opens it´s gates and lets me soar


& this evening written-poem actually had a night-1.morning-2.morning-real-life sequence, what made me face the awesome fact, that my heart did indeed need something and .. I realised that after getting a glimpse of it. Leather, old books and tea. The theatre of life can go on without me.. not. All matter. All. Life is Art. ;D and.. all you might need.. is a telephone ring ;)